Funny and Inspirational Quotes about Mothers

  • "Cleaning up with children around is like shoveling during a blizzard" ~ Author Unknown
  • "If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?" ~Milton Berle
  • "The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new." ~Rajneesh

Bookmark and Share



When is Mother's Day and Mothering Sunday in 2011

YearMothering Sunday
in the U.K.
Mothers Day
in the U.S.

2011April 3May 8
2012March 18May 13
2013March 10May 12
2014March 30May 11

Bookmark and Share


Great Poem for Mother's Day -Mother Doesn't Want a Dog by Judith Viorst

Mother Doesn't Want a Dog

Mother doesn't want a dog.
Mother says they smell,
And never sit when you say sit,
Or even when you yell.
And when you come home late at night
And there is ice and snow,
You have to go back out because
The dumb dog has to go.

Mother doesn't want a dog.
Mother says they shed,
And always let the strangers in
And bark at friends instead,
And do disgraceful things on rugs,
And track mud on the floor,
And flop upon your bed at night
And snore their doggy snore.

Mother doesn't want a dog.
She's making a mistake.
Because, more than a dog, I think
She will not want this snake.

Bookmark and Share

Mother's Day Poem -To My Mother by Edgar Allan Poe

To My Mother 
Because I feel that, in the Heavens above,
The angels, whispering to one another,
Can find, among their burning terms of love,
None so devotional as that of "Mother,"
Therefore by that dear name I long have called you—
You who are more than mother unto me,
And fill my heart of hearts, where Death installed you
In setting my Virginia's spirit free.
My mother—my own mother, who died early,
Was but the mother of myself; but you
Are mother to the one I loved so dearly,
And thus are dearer than the mother I knew
By that infinity with which my wife
Was dearer to my soul than its soul-life.

Bookmark and Share

Mother's Day Poem by Christina Rossetti- To My Mother

To My Mother 

To-day's your natal day;
    Sweet flowers I bring:
Mother, accept, I pray
    My offering.

And may you happy live,
    And long us bless;
Receiving as you give
    Great happiness.

Bookmark and Share

Mother O' Mine - poem by Rudyard Kipling

Mother o' Mine 

If I were hanged on the highest hill, 
Mother o' mine, O mother o' mine!
I know whose love would follow me still, 
Mother o' mine, O mother o' mine!

If I were drowned in the deepest sea, 
Mother o' mine, O mother o' mine!
I know whose tears would come down to me, 
Mother o' mine, O mother o' mine!

If I were damned of body and soul, 
I know whose prayers would make me whole, 
Mother o' mine, O mother o' mine!

Bookmark and Share

Take your wife out for Mother's Day and Keep your Mouth Shut! Funny video!

Bookmark and Share

Maxine's Husband's Great Mother's Day Gift for Maxine! Funny!!

Maybe I'll stop watching Hockey, Baseball, Basketball, Football, and soccer for a few hours on Mother's Day.
Maybe not!

Bookmark and Share

Mother's Day Quotes

An ode to mothers! They have toiled, they have sacrificed, they have given more than we can ever imagine possible. Here is a special collection of Mother's Day Quotes for our boldest and gentlest mothers. If you can't say it with words, say it with these quotes.
  • John Erskine
    Woman in the home has not yet lost her dignity, in spite of Mother's Day, with its offensive implication that our love needs an annual nudging, like our enthusiasm for the battle of Bunker Hill.
  • Oscar Wilde
    All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his.
  • Rajneesh
    The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new.
  • Peter de Vries
    A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after.
  • Author Unknown
    All mothers are working mothers.
  • Oliver Wendell Holmes
    The real religion of the world comes from women much more than from men – from mothers most of all, who carry the key of our souls in their bosoms.
  • Helen Hunt Jackson
    Motherhood is priced; Of God, at price no man may dare/To lessen or misunderstand.
  • Barbara Kingsolver
    It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't.
  • Jewish Proverb
    God could not be everywhere and therefore he made mothers.
  • Abraham Lincoln
    I remember my mother's prayers and they have always followed me. They have clung to me all my life.
  • Mildred B Vermont
    Being a full-time mother is one of the highest salaried jobs... since the payment is pure love.
  • Henry Bickersteth
    If the whole world were put into one scale, and my mother in the other, the whole world would kick the beam.
  • T. DeWitt Talmage
    Mother – that was the bank where we deposited all our hurts and worries.
  • Chinese Proverb
    There is only one pretty child in the world, and every mother has it.

Bookmark and Share

Mother’s Day gifts that don’t cost the Earth!

Mother’s Day gifts that don’t cost the Earth!
Good bet: Organic and/or locally-grown flowers
Better yet: A potted plant that comes with an offer to help plant it in her garden
Good bet: Organic and/or fair trade chocolates
Better yet: Hand-made goodies from your own kitchen
Good bet: Cards that are made from recycled paper, “tree-free” materials such as hemp or botanical paper embedded with seeds for planting
Better yet: Handmade cards made from recycled materials that send the message, “I care enough about you to make a one-of-a-kind greeting that is as unique as you are.”
Good bet: Natural personal care products and perfumes that are made from essential oils and natural ingredients
Better yet: A gift certificate for a spa treatment or a natural therapy such as a massage, aromatherapy or reflexology
Good bet: Brunch at her favourite restaurant
Better yet: A picnic lovingly prepared and served in her own backyard
Good bet: Gift wrap made from recycled materials
Better yet: Use tea towels or hand towels for gift wrap that can be reused over and over.

Bookmark and Share

Standing Women on Mother's Day


Maxine's List of the Worst Mother's Day gifts for your Wife or Mother

A toaster - never

Or any Household Appliances

Exercise Equipment - sends the wrong message!

Breakfast in Bed - Bad, messy idea!

Lottery Tickets - $2 ticket not too thoughtfull. Chance of winning-nill!

Email card - can't replace the good old real card.

Bath sets - don't you just hate how they pile up under the sink!?

Yard Tools - no way!

New BBQ - it's the only break a woman gets when the guy cooks. Who is the gift rreally for?

Pets - can you believe it?

A list of things you will do for her. - never happens!

A Mug - how many does she need?

Toilet Bowl Brush - can you imagine?

New dust mop or vacuum cleaner - just as bad

Nothing,  because,"You"re not my Mother ." and that's when the fight started...

Bookmark and Share


Funny Mother's Dictionary of Meanings and Wisdom for Mother's Day

Dumbwaiter: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.

Feedback: The inevitable result when the baby doesn't appreciate the strained carrots.

Full Name: What you call your child when you're mad at him.

Grandparents: The people who think your children are wonderful even though they're sure you're not raising them right.

Hearsay: What toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.

Independent: How we want our children to be for as long as they do everything we say.

Puddle: A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it.

Show Off: A child who is more talented than yours.

Sterilize: What you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it, and to your last baby's pacifier by blowing on it and wiping it with saliva.

Top Bunk: Where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.

Two-Minute Warning: When the baby's face turns red and she begins to make those familiar-grunting noises.

Whodunit: None of the kids that live in your house.

Bookmark and Share

Maxine Mother's Day Humour!

Bookmark and Share

Mother's Day Angels Beautiful Quote and Picture

Mother’s Day Angels

Bookmark and Share

Just might be the Best Mother's Day Gift

Hugs ...

There's something in a simple hug
That always warms the heart;
It welcomes us back home
Makes it easier to part.

A hug's a way to share the joy,
And sad times we go through,
Or just a way for friends to say
They like you 'cause you're you.

Hugs are meant for anyone
For whom we really care,
From grandma to your neighbour,
Or a cuddly teddy bear.

A hug is an amazing thing-
It's just the perfect way
To show the love we're feeling
But can't find the words to say.

It's funny how a little hug
Makes everyone feel good;
In every place and language,
It's always understood.

No special equipment needed,
No batteries or parts-
Just open up your arms
And open up your hearts.

Bookmark and Share

The Writing on the Wall ... Poem For Mother's Day

A weary mother returned from the store, Lugging groceries through the kitchen door.Awaiting her arrival was her 8 year old son, Anxious to relate what his younger brother had done. While I was out playing and Dad was on a call, T.J. took his crayons and wrote on the wall It's on the new paper you just hung in the den. I told him you'd be mad at having to do it again.

She let out a moan and furrowed her brow.Where is your little brother right now? She emptied her arms and with a purposeful stride, She marched to his closet where he had gone to hide. She called his full name as she entered his room. He trembled with fear--he knew that meant doom For the next ten minutes, she ranted and raved About the expensive wallpaper and how she had saved. Lamenting all the work it would take to repair, She condemned his actions and total lack of care. The more she scolded, the madder she got,Then stomped from his room, totally distraught She headed for the den to confirm her fears.

When she saw the wall, her eyes flooded with tears. The message she read pierced her soul with a dart. It said, I love Mommy, surrounded by a heart. Well, the wallpaper remained, just as she found it - With an empty picture frame hung to surround it.
A reminder to her, and indeed to all, Take time to read the handwriting on the wall.
Author Unknown

Bookmark and Share

Happy Mother's Day to Super Mom Cartoon- Very Funny but true!

Happy Mother’s Day to Super Mom Cartoon

Bookmark and Share

Maxine Mother's Day Wisdom Cartoon

It's Mother's Day! 24 hours where you get to see what a perfect family would be like.

Bookmark and Share

Maxine Mother's Day Cartoon / Joke

Bookmark and ShareAlthough She Says I'm Not A Disappointment-For My Mommy

Top Gifts for Mother's Day -Beyond Chocolates and Flowers

Like a Great Massage!!!

Top Gifts for Mother’s Day -Beyond Chocolates and Flowers

Bookmark and Share

A Mother Like No Other - Gift Ideas

2182938afif4xrr7r.gif mothers day image by angwbc

At the end of the day, give her a card (even if you went all out for a gift). This is a must. Take the time to personalize the message you write, as she may very well remember this above all else. Don't be lazy and let Hallmark do all the work -- they're good, sure, but you must incorporate your personal comment for the desired effect.

Album, book, help around the house, make dinner, tribute video, take her out for a private dinner.

Avoid the "typical mom present." You know, the apron, the oven mitt, the random kitchen utensil. Do something that will reinforce her individuality and reflect how much you appreciate her.

If necessary, save the practical gifts for her birthday and use Mother's Day as an opportunity to show true, spirited affection. Despite the many options, your central purpose on Mother's Day is simple and straightforward: Tell the mothers in your life how much you love and appreciate them.
Bookmark and Share


For Mother's Day Why I love Mom


Mum and Dad were watching TV when Mum said, 'I'm tired, and it's getting late. I think I'll go to bed'

She went to the kitchen to make sandwiches for the next day's lunches.

Rinsed out the popcorn bowls, took meat out of the freezer for dinner the following evening, checked the cereal box levels, filled the sugar container and put spoons and bowls on the table.

She then put some wet clothes in the dryer, put a load of clothes into the washer, ironed a shirt and secured a loose button

She picked up the game pieces left on the table, put the phone back on the charger and put the telephone book into the drawer.

She watered the plants, emptied a rubbish bin and hung up a towel to dry. 

She yawned and stretched and headed for the bedroom. She stopped by the desk and wrote a note to the teacher, counted out some cash for an excursion, and pulled a text book out from hiding under the chair.

She signed a birthday card for a friend, addressed and stamped the envelope and wrote a quick note for the grocery store. She put both near her purse.

Mum then washed her face with 3 in 1 cleanser, put on her Night solution & age fighting moisturiser, brushed and flossed her teeth and filed her nails.

Dad called out, 'I thought you were going to bed.'

'I'm on my way,' she said.

She put some water into the dog's dish and put the cat outside, then made sure the doors were locked..

She looked in on each of the kids and turned out their bedside lamps and TV's, hung up a shirt, threw some dirty socks into the basket, and had a brief conversation with the one up still doing homework.

In her own room, she set the alarm; laid out clothing for the next day, straightened up the shoe rack. She added three things to her 6 most important things to do list. She said her prayers, and visualised the accomplishment of her goals. 

About that time, Dad turned off the TV and announced to no one in particular. 'I'm going to bed.'

And he did...without another thought.

Anything extraordinary here? Wonder why women
 live longer...?

CAUSE WE ARE MADE FOR THE LONG HAUL...... (and we can't die sooner, we still have things to do!!!!)

Bookmark and Share

50 Inspirational Quotes For Mother's Day

50 Inspirational Quotes For Mother’s Day

Bookmark and Share

Send Free Mother's Day cards and ecards

Click the link for a great site for sending free ecards for Mother's Day:

Bookmark and Share

FIFA WORLD CUP FOOTBALL (SOCCER) 2010 SOUTH AFRICA *June 11 - July 11, 2010: Dont' Forget May 9th is Mother's Day

FIFA WORLD CUP FOOTBALL (SOCCER) 2010 SOUTH AFRICA *June 11 - July 11, 2010: Dont' Forget May 9th is Mother's Day

Bookmark and Share

Mother’s Wisdom or Truisms

Mother’s Wisdom or Truisms

Bookmark and Share


Buying a Bra for Mother’s Day!

Buying a Bra for Mother’s Day!

Bookmark and Share

Happy Mother's Day (More Than Love) - Original Song David Choi

Bookmark and Share

Mother's Day Poems

You can see it in their eyes,
in tender hugs and long good-byes,
a love that only moms and daughters know.
You can see it in their smiles,
through passing years and changing styles,
a friendship that continually seems to grow.
You can see it in their lives,
the joy each one of them derives,
in just knowing that the other one is there…
To care and to understand,
lend an ear or hold a hand,
and to celebrate the memories they share.
Once upon a memory
Someone wiped away a tear
Held me close and loved me,
Thank you, Mother dear.

Bookmark and Share


Homemade Love for Mother's Day!

Finding a gift for Mom or Grandma on Mother’s Day does not have to be stressful or expensive.  Women everywhere can attest to the fact that Mom does not care “what” she is given on Mother’s Day, she just wants to know that she is appreciated and loved.  Those are things that can’t be bought; they must be shown.  So, give the special Mom in your life that gift – the gift of love on Mother’s Day.

Bookmark and Share